Guess what happened this week? Hayden said his first word! I think.
Hayden's "vocabulary" has been growing. He says "Mama/Mumumumum", "Baba", "Bla", "LaLa", "Hu", "Vvvuh", "FFF", and a host of other growls and squeals. But even though he says "Mama" I don't think he quite says "Mama" to mean "Mommy" I think he's just babbling. But this week, I believe his first real word, where he knows what he is saying, is "OFF". You see, Hayden loves to flip the light switches on and off every time we enter and leave a room. In fact, if you are holding him and you walk past a light switch, he practically leaps out of your arms to reach at the light switch. He is so good at flipping them with just his thumb and index finger. And every time he flips it, I say "ON" or "OFF". And lately, when we are playing with the light switch, he says, "OFF". Plain as day. Repeatedly. I cheer at him. Then he claps and smiles. I know he knows he is saying it. Should I write it in the Baby Book as his first word? Hmmm...
Also this week:
On Monday, Hayden had his first dentist appointment. Most people say you don't need to take your baby to the dentist until they are about 3 years old. I've read in some resources that it doesn't hurt to take them by their first birthday. Then it's not such a scary experience as they get older. And since Hayden already has 8 teeth, and dental hygiene is important, we wanted to get started early. It's more about parent education than actually doing anything at this point. The dentist office was not really what I was expecting out of a Pediatric Dentist practice. It seemed basically the same as my dentist office, except it didn't even have fish tanks, which Hayden loves. So we were disappointed. The dentist examined his mouth (not very gently, surprisingly), the hygienist used an electric polisher/brush on his teeth, which he actually didn't mind, and said we need to be sure to brush well twice a day. Usually Hayden likes to chew on the toothbrush so brushing "well" might be a challenge. They even recommended using a TINY dab of baby-safe (fluoride-free) toothpaste, which actually helps if Hayden doesn't want his teeth brushed since he likes the taste of the toothpaste. The dentist also encouraged us to try to avoid night nursing, starting to transition from a bottle to a sippy cup for milk, and weaning the pacifier.
I tried milk in a sippy cup. He drinks water from a sippy cup just fine. But milk? No. He had a disgusted look on his face, threw the cup, and put his hands up over his mouth. I tried again later. Nope! I wonder if it's that he was expecting water so it startles him? Kind of like if we expect water and get 7Up. He drank the milk from a bottle just after I tried, so I know he wanted it. Weird. This will be interesting. On a side note, he drank water from a straw for the first time at Starbucks this week. But when I try to repeat it at home, he just chews on the straw.
On to the pacifier. For the past 2 months or so, he has only used a pacifier when he sleeps. I don't even bring one with me when I go out anymore, unless I know we will be out a long time like last week when we went to Easter church service in Enumclaw. He didn't seem reliant on the pacifier, we just gave it to him as part of the routine for naps and night sleep. So we tried not giving him the pacifier. Well I guess he's more stuck to the pacifier than we thought. He fought sleep for over half an hour and when I finally gave in and gave him the pacifier, he fell asleep almost instantly. Since he hasn't been napping that great this week anyway, I decided to give up the idea of weaning the pacifier until a little later. He's only 10 months old! It's not like he's a 5 year old walking around the mall with it in his mouth!
We've also been trying to get Hayden to drink some formula for the past couple weeks. We got a sample of a hypo-allergenic non-dairy kind from the pediatrician, and he hated the stuff. I have to say, I think it stinks too. But unfortunately my milk supply continues to seem low, and it would be good to have formula as a back-up or to transition to instead of Whole Milk. I've been offering him a bottle of a mix of breast milk and formula about once a day. He seems to be doing ok with a 50/50 blend, but any more than that and he refuses it. And usually I also have to turn the tv to a recording of "Super Why" or "Signing Time" so he is distracted and takes the bottle without question. So much for no tv until he's 2. ;)
He's also been picky with foods lately. He used to love just about anything we'd put in front of him, but lately he seems to prefer things he can crunch or chew. I think his 1-year molars are starting to make their way to the surface, so it probably feels better on his gums. He likes Cheerios, Teddy Puffs, Apple Wagon Wheels (a Gerber Graduates snack), Noodles, cooked carrots and green beans, and small fruit pieces of Mango or peaches. Too bad I have a freezer full of pureed fruits and vegetables! I'm just finding ways of sneaking them in, like adding noodles to the vegetables, etc. So funny that a month ago, he was gagging on anything not pureed to the smoothest texture! How quickly he grows and changes!
I hope none of this ever sounds like I'm complaining. Raising Hayden is such an exciting, amazing experience I wouldn't trade for anything. Even the challenges are the "good" kind of challenges, that help me grow as a parent and person. The thought of my life without Hayden seems empty and boring. Being a mom adds so much meaning and adventure to my life. He is absolutely the best thing that God could have ever given us.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Week 44
Hayden turned 10 months old this week, on March 20th. TEN MONTHS OLD!! How did that happen?!
We've had a good week. Finally made it to a PEPS group meeting since neither of us were a) sick, b) napping or c) working (man, I hate it when Hayden's work schedule interferes with our social calendar! ;) It was so great to see all the moms and babies again. We hadn't been together since the swimming day, and hadn't been to a regular meeting since before Hayden's 3-week bout with diarrhea. Even though we've stayed connected over email, it just hasn't been the same. I'm so blessed to have these families in my life. I can see lifelong friendships for both myself and Hayden developing.
Working as a freelance designer at home continues to be challenging for me. I feel so mentally and physically exhausted and don't get many breaks from being either Mommy or Designer. Not that I really have much to complain about with being Hayden's Mommy. He is so amazing, wonderful, and easy compared to some stories I hear. But still, being a Mom is a FULL TIME job that often requires a lot of energy, so throwing in design work on top of that has had it's ups and downs. Thankfully, my Aunt Teri came over on Good Friday and babysat Hayden for the day, just for fun. Phil had the day off too so we went to a movie. Later that night Phil's brother Jim and his wife Rachel came over to babysit while Phil and I went to my former co-worker's 30th birthday bash and had a great time. So at least Friday was a nice relaxing day off! And Hayden continues to do really well with babysitters. Yay!
On Saturday Phil and I took Hayden to the University of Washington where the cherry blossoms are in full bloom at the Quad. It was a perfect Spring day and Hayden loved the trees and watching all the people and dogs there. I hope this becomes an annual tradition for our family.
Easter was also a great day (not the weather, but the events). It would have been even better if Hayden slept better the night before. For some reason he would not fall back to sleep after his 4:45 am nursing, so around 6:00am, I finally brought him into our bed, he fell asleep instantly, but then we needed to get up and ready to be at Aunt Teri's church in Enumclaw by 8:30am! So basically, Phil and I had been up since 4:45 am. Hayden was an angel through the church service and the brunch afterward, but had a really tough time going down for his nap around noon when we got home because he was so over-tired by that point. (Unfortunately, he still doesn't sleep in the car.) After he finally fell asleep around 1:15pm, we had to wake him up around 3:15 to head over to Phil's parent's house in Kirkland for Easter Supper. It was a full day, but always nice to get all the family together. And Hayden looked SO ADORABLE in his button-down shirt, sweater vest, and brown linen pants! It was fun sharing him with all the family.
Grandma Doris and Grandpa Jim with their 4 Grandsons
Monday, March 17, 2008
Week 43
Sorry I'm a day late in posting. I've been swamped with freelance work and having to do some late nights to meet deadlines. Starting to feel like I'm in college again! Fortunately, Hayden has been sleeping GREAT! I almost hate to say anything for fear of jinxing it, but he's been sleeping from about 7:30pm to 7:30 am STRAIGHT almost every night for the past 2 weeks. Only maybe 2 nights in the past 2 weeks he woke up around 3:30am for a quick nursing and as usual went straight back to sleep.
I actually think Daylight Savings Time kind of threw him off a little and it helped him to have an "earlier" bedtime and naps a little later. He's had some great napping patterns too: two good 1.5-2 hour naps every day. He's still struggling a bit to fall asleep, since all he wants to do is stand up (and jump on the squeaky spot) in his crib. But sometimes after about 15 minutes of jumping and babbling (or his new favorite - high-pitched screeching, an old return from his pterodactyl days!) I go back in his room, make no eye-contact, lay him back down, and walk back out (a tip from Supernanny!). Then he finally falls asleep and he takes a good nap. I guess all that jumping wears him out! Sometimes I don't need to go back in his room and he falls asleep on his own.
He's also been doing great with babysitters. No sign of separation anxiety or stranger anxiety. Phil's mom has been helping me out once week so I can get a good chunk of concentrated design work done. Hayden really loves his Grandma Doris and is always an angel for her.
He had a bit of a rough day at church on Sunday because he hadn't had his morning nap yet and just got way over-tired. It has been tough to make it to church at all. It was only his 2nd time in the nursery without one of us. Phil was scheduled on set-up crew and both of us were scheduled for Preschool teaching so we had no choice, but it was really hard on Hayden and the workers in the nursery. They had to come get me because he was crying so hard and wouldn't take his bottle and nothing would calm him down. He was SO TIRED. Phil ended up bringing him into our preschool class and holding him in his lap the whole time. He calmed down and thankfully took a long nap once we got home (as did Phil and I). I don't know how often I want to repeat that ordeal! I'm frustrated with the kids' conditions at our church as it is. Since our church meets in an elementary school, we have to set up and tear down church every week. We have the preschool kids at one end of a hallway and the babies in a little alcove area halfway down the hall. Not ideal. That's partly why I don't make more of an effort to go to church with Hayden too. I know I'm just being an over-protective first-time mom, but some of the conditions worry me. I'm just not comfortable with Hayden in the nursery, let alone that it totally messes up his naps and the entire day!
We got all our safety gates up on the stairs. Here is a video of why it was such an urgent matter:
I actually think Daylight Savings Time kind of threw him off a little and it helped him to have an "earlier" bedtime and naps a little later. He's had some great napping patterns too: two good 1.5-2 hour naps every day. He's still struggling a bit to fall asleep, since all he wants to do is stand up (and jump on the squeaky spot) in his crib. But sometimes after about 15 minutes of jumping and babbling (or his new favorite - high-pitched screeching, an old return from his pterodactyl days!) I go back in his room, make no eye-contact, lay him back down, and walk back out (a tip from Supernanny!). Then he finally falls asleep and he takes a good nap. I guess all that jumping wears him out! Sometimes I don't need to go back in his room and he falls asleep on his own.
He's also been doing great with babysitters. No sign of separation anxiety or stranger anxiety. Phil's mom has been helping me out once week so I can get a good chunk of concentrated design work done. Hayden really loves his Grandma Doris and is always an angel for her.
He had a bit of a rough day at church on Sunday because he hadn't had his morning nap yet and just got way over-tired. It has been tough to make it to church at all. It was only his 2nd time in the nursery without one of us. Phil was scheduled on set-up crew and both of us were scheduled for Preschool teaching so we had no choice, but it was really hard on Hayden and the workers in the nursery. They had to come get me because he was crying so hard and wouldn't take his bottle and nothing would calm him down. He was SO TIRED. Phil ended up bringing him into our preschool class and holding him in his lap the whole time. He calmed down and thankfully took a long nap once we got home (as did Phil and I). I don't know how often I want to repeat that ordeal! I'm frustrated with the kids' conditions at our church as it is. Since our church meets in an elementary school, we have to set up and tear down church every week. We have the preschool kids at one end of a hallway and the babies in a little alcove area halfway down the hall. Not ideal. That's partly why I don't make more of an effort to go to church with Hayden too. I know I'm just being an over-protective first-time mom, but some of the conditions worry me. I'm just not comfortable with Hayden in the nursery, let alone that it totally messes up his naps and the entire day!
We got all our safety gates up on the stairs. Here is a video of why it was such an urgent matter:
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Week 42
Hayden is officially CRAWLING! Occasionally he still reverts back to the "commando-style" but for the most part, he is on 2 hands and 2 knees, all over the house. All he wants to do is crawl and stand. It is incredible to see the progress he has made in the last week. I think that's largely due to him FINALLY feeling better! YAY! And he slept for 12 hours straight both last night and the night before. I guess all this mobility is wearing him out!
This week on Wednesday night, Phil and I attended a lecture at Seattle's Town Hall by Dr. John Gottman on "Raising and Emotionally Intelligent Child". Wow. It was a fantastic lecture and very timely since teaching children about their emotions can begin as early as Hayden's age now.
Dr. Gottman described 2 parenting styles: "Emotion-Dismissing Parents" and "Emotion-Coaching Parents". The Emotion-Dismissing Parents make up about 2/3 of parents in his research group. They don't like negative emotions such as sadness, anger, and fear. They see them as "toxins" they need to protect their child from, and prefer their child to be cheerful. Their response is to help their child "snap out of it" by distracting them, playing down the emotion, and sometimes even punish them. They see negative emotions as failures, and become impatient with a sad or angry child. While their intentions seem good, this actually teaches children that their feelings are bad, not to trust their feelings, that they are weird, alone, and that they can't talk to their parents.
Emotion-Coaching Parents on the other hand, see negative emotions as a healthy part of development, an opportunity for discussion, growth, and empathy. These kids are better at self-soothing, get along better with other peers and adults/teachers, and even their reading & math scores are higher.
According to Dr. Gottman, there are 5 steps to Emotion Coaching:
1) Noticing the emotion
2) Recognizing as an opportunity for intimacy and teaching
3) Listening and empathizing, validate their feelings
4) Providing verbal labels for the emotion
5) Setting limits, help the child problem-solve, communicate values and appropriate behaviors
I have been devouring his book and realize my parenting instincts will be challenged to think and respond in this way. Even today at the park, Hayden was getting cranky and Phil and I responded like the "emotion-dismissing parent" - tickling him, offering him Cheerios, laughing at him for being so 'cute' when he cries. I realize we can't really put all these steps into practice with a 9-month old baby, but it is very interesting to be thinking about all these ideas now.
This week on Wednesday night, Phil and I attended a lecture at Seattle's Town Hall by Dr. John Gottman on "Raising and Emotionally Intelligent Child". Wow. It was a fantastic lecture and very timely since teaching children about their emotions can begin as early as Hayden's age now.
Dr. Gottman described 2 parenting styles: "Emotion-Dismissing Parents" and "Emotion-Coaching Parents". The Emotion-Dismissing Parents make up about 2/3 of parents in his research group. They don't like negative emotions such as sadness, anger, and fear. They see them as "toxins" they need to protect their child from, and prefer their child to be cheerful. Their response is to help their child "snap out of it" by distracting them, playing down the emotion, and sometimes even punish them. They see negative emotions as failures, and become impatient with a sad or angry child. While their intentions seem good, this actually teaches children that their feelings are bad, not to trust their feelings, that they are weird, alone, and that they can't talk to their parents.
Emotion-Coaching Parents on the other hand, see negative emotions as a healthy part of development, an opportunity for discussion, growth, and empathy. These kids are better at self-soothing, get along better with other peers and adults/teachers, and even their reading & math scores are higher.
According to Dr. Gottman, there are 5 steps to Emotion Coaching:
1) Noticing the emotion
2) Recognizing as an opportunity for intimacy and teaching
3) Listening and empathizing, validate their feelings
4) Providing verbal labels for the emotion
5) Setting limits, help the child problem-solve, communicate values and appropriate behaviors
I have been devouring his book and realize my parenting instincts will be challenged to think and respond in this way. Even today at the park, Hayden was getting cranky and Phil and I responded like the "emotion-dismissing parent" - tickling him, offering him Cheerios, laughing at him for being so 'cute' when he cries. I realize we can't really put all these steps into practice with a 9-month old baby, but it is very interesting to be thinking about all these ideas now.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Week 41
Grandma Judi, Grandpa Mark, and Aunt Ali came out from Ann Arbor, MI for a visit for the first half of this week. Ali (my "little" sister - who is now taller than me) was out touring some Universities. She's a Junior in High School this year so she'll need to start applying to colleges next year. Wow! I just can't believe how time flies! She liked Seattle University best, followed closely by UW. She's also planning on visiting UCLA, Berkley, and Stanford later this month and some others too, I think. Right now, she's thinking of majoring in pre-med and has the grades and SAT scores to pretty much choose where she wants to go. I'm so proud of her!
We had a nice visit, despite Hayden still having a horrible cold. They stayed with us, and since our former guest bedroom is now Hayden's room, Phil and I slept on an air mattress on the floor of Hayden's room while my parents took our bedroom and my sister took the couch in the living room. It wouldn't have been too bad, except everytime Hayden would cough, it would wake me up. Almost every night at some point he would cough so hard and gag on the mucous it would make him throw up all over himself and in his crib. So I'd bring him into bed on the air mattress with us, which left me sleeping with one eye open because air mattresses aren't very safe for babies to sleep on. Needless to say, Hayden and I weren't at our best for the visit with the family. :(
Now I've caught the cold too and am miserable. I would really love to have a good stretch of healthy days coming up here sometime soon. We are way overdue!
Hayden's greatest progress this week has been in pulling himself up on the furniture and standing. In fact, that is practically all he wants to do. It's making nap-time more difficult because all he wants to do is stand up in his crib (and chew on the crib rail!) He can also move from one piece of furniture to the next if they are close enough. We are scrambling to babyproof EVERYTHING.
He loves chewing on whatever furniture he can -- his crib, our new ottoman, and even the window sill (drywall and all - yuck!). Actually, he just loves chewing on everything. With 8 teeth already, I wonder when this teething phase will ever decrease?
Auntie Ali
Grandma Judi
Grandpa Mark
We had a nice visit, despite Hayden still having a horrible cold. They stayed with us, and since our former guest bedroom is now Hayden's room, Phil and I slept on an air mattress on the floor of Hayden's room while my parents took our bedroom and my sister took the couch in the living room. It wouldn't have been too bad, except everytime Hayden would cough, it would wake me up. Almost every night at some point he would cough so hard and gag on the mucous it would make him throw up all over himself and in his crib. So I'd bring him into bed on the air mattress with us, which left me sleeping with one eye open because air mattresses aren't very safe for babies to sleep on. Needless to say, Hayden and I weren't at our best for the visit with the family. :(
Now I've caught the cold too and am miserable. I would really love to have a good stretch of healthy days coming up here sometime soon. We are way overdue!
Hayden's greatest progress this week has been in pulling himself up on the furniture and standing. In fact, that is practically all he wants to do. It's making nap-time more difficult because all he wants to do is stand up in his crib (and chew on the crib rail!) He can also move from one piece of furniture to the next if they are close enough. We are scrambling to babyproof EVERYTHING.
He loves chewing on whatever furniture he can -- his crib, our new ottoman, and even the window sill (drywall and all - yuck!). Actually, he just loves chewing on everything. With 8 teeth already, I wonder when this teething phase will ever decrease?
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